Have you ever been in a situation where someone asks you, “Lizette (or whatever your name is), are you a Christian?” 

And you’re like, “Uhm, ye-ah!”

It’s usually an older lady, who would look you dead in the eye, as though boring into your soul. And then they’d ask, “But are you BORN AGAIN?” 

So, I was “that Christian” until about a year ago when we started attending Rhema South Coast Family Church. At that time, I tried to be a good homey to James, and stood up with him to rededicate our lives to Jesus when Pastor Larry asked again…

“Are you suuuuuuuuuuurrrree you’re going to heaven?”

He really lingered that morning… and we had just spoken about the topics the previous week when we arrived home from church.

What’s it like to be born again, for real?

Throughout my life, I never really understood the whole “born again” thing properly. Somewhere along the way, I seemed to have blocked out the “go ahead and sin no more” part, and the “renewal of the mind” and the “create in me a clean heart”. 

Before, I always believed that my faith is between me and God, and that churches just want tithes to build bigger buildings, and that people just go to church on a Sunday and carry on doing the same thing all week long.

When James and I joined Rhema, I learned that I was right about all of that!

FACT: My faith is between me and God

But a little guidance and direction along the way makes a HUGE difference and that’s why you should go to church. A Bible-based church teaches you how to go out and make disciplines, as Jesus instructed.

You have to take in the word of God, and TikTok and Spotify are not enough. I must admit though that it helps if you truly have no other options.

We give Pastoor Desmond Wessels from Gauteng a HUGE shoutout for encouraging us to go to slot into a local church. We still listen to his messages daily, as they provide much practical advice for dealing with daily occurances like Jesus would.

FACT: (Some) churches just want tithes to build bigger buildings 

Jesus said go be fishers of men; where do you expect them to sit and be equipped to go fish if there’s no space in the auditorium?

Some churches also support widows, single mothers, and orphans. They do food parcels (have you seen the cost of food lately?). They help people out with counseling in times of crises, bring up the youth in the ways of the Lord, support women’s shelters around the world, build ministries around the world, and pay all kinds of bills I had never in my life imagined, until I actually became involved with the church… and I haven’t seen the tip of the iceberg. 

The bigger the impact the charge makes, the bigger the bills. And yes, this applies to many of the big pastors who support disaster rescue missions after tsunamis and earthquakes, and fly to far-off destinations in private jets. 

The truth is that your tithes are between you and God and He tells you to give 10% to your church.

If you don’t trust your church with God’s money, then you need to go to a church you DO trust. Or you must work on your heart condition.

But remember, that’s God’s money you’re using for your own gain in the meantime… How can God bless that?

FACT:  (Some) people just go to church on a Sunday and carry on doing the same thing all week long. 

I must say, it came as a little bit of a shock to James and myself when we realised we were those people. At some point, we’d have a drink before church on a Sunday morning. 

But see, it’s not about works. It’s not about doing all the things right on the outside.

God looks at your heart condition.

An Encounter with God 

Right around the time we rededicated our lives, and we went from homies to a couple, the Family Matters series, by Pastor Larry Elliott, came along, and we started understanding God’s design for marriage. 

We attended an Encounter Weekend, which allowed us to build a deeper connection with God, and where we finally learned to speak in tongues (hallelujah!). This culminated in our baptism in water on the Sunday. 

Although we had both been baptised previously, we had both backslid, and felt we needed that to wash us clean for once and for all. The water is a symbol of the cleansing Blood of Jesus that redeems us from our past wicked ways, cleanses us from our sins, forgives us, sanctifies us and sets us apart for Godly purpose, and justifies us. We’re no longer the people we were. 

We had a renewal of our hearts, minds, and spirits. The old person is no more. 

Of course, when we become born again, we don’t really do all the same things we used to do.

We no longer go to all the same places we used to go to.

We no longer frequent the same social media pages.

We no longer have the same types of conversations. 

We no longer do the same things with the same people.

It’s not because we think we’re better. We are simply prioritising God’s calling on our lives.

We had to learn to take authority over our bodies and minds. The enemy plants toxic thoughts and visions into our minds through the various things we encounter day to day, and we have to ask God to teach us to discern what’s truth and what’s not. 

We don’t think we’re better; we just think better than we used to. 

A simplified version of the process of renewal of the heart is found in Galatians 5. I encourage you to read the whole chapter. Here’s a summary:

You’re called to freedom (by taking authority over your body and mind), not to indulge your sinful nature, but to humbly serve one another in love. This fulfills the entire law: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” Without love, conflict will destroy your relationships.

The key is to walk by the Spirit to resist the desires of your sinful nature. When led by the Spirit, you are not bound by the law. God takes away the desire to do the wrong things. 

Aspects of our sinful nature

The acts of the sinful nature are clear: sexual immorality, impurity, debauchery, idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and similar behaviors. Those who live this way will not inherit God’s kingdom. If you avoid those things, you also won’t break the Ten Commandments. 

In contrast, the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There’s no law against these. If you belong to Christ, you’ve crucified your sinful nature. Since you live by the Spirit, keep in step with the Spirit, avoiding conceit, provocation, or envy.

Walking with Jesus

As James and I started walking side by side with Jesus, we kind of started liking it… and each other. We realised we are better than good mates. We figured it might be nice to do life together. 

So we joined hands and decided to start pre-marital counseling for one day in 2025 maybe, God-willing (we learned the importance of God’s will in everything in our lives…). Trusting God with this big decision was the best thing ever, as Pastor Larry proposed a date before James even proposed to me! 

Honoring our mentors

We’re especially thankful that our spiritual father, Stan, who had gone to be with the Lord just over a week ago, was able to be a witness along with his darling, Maureen. They say you must surround yourself with people you admire, and Stan’s celebration of life confirmed that they are exactly the people in whose footsteps one should follow, after Jesus. 

I had my doubts when Maureen invited us to a cell group meeting, and James readily agreed. Of course, business had gone down and we didn’t really have work, so I couldn’t use that as an excuse not to go. So, I decided I’ll go on the weeks when we don’t have work. 

Suffice to say, it took a long time for work to come in. Be careful what you pray for!

Funny enough, after that first cell, I never thought about making up an excuse not to go. We have the best group of senior Christians who pour so much wisdom into our lives and they’re an absolute blast to hang with. We look forward to every Tuesday, when we host them in our home of all places!

A quick side note: Waiting for marriage (even at the ripe old age of somewhere in your 40s and 50s) when you’ve both had lives before, seems stupid. I mean you only have so much energy and time left to love one another, right? 

Well, all we can say is TRUST US. Don’t be hasty. Wait. Because God restores your youth like that of an eagle while the Songs of Solomon play on angel harps when you wait until marriage. It’s a whole different level of intimacy than anything outside of a covenant marriage. 

Where was I now? Oh yes. Our spiritual journey over the last year. 

Tithing…

At some point, the Holy Spirit convicted me about tithing. I know and believe what the Bible says about tithing, and I realised it actually has nothing to do with me what happens to the money. It’s God’s money, and His instruction in His word says “bring your tithes to the storehouse”, which I finally interpreted as my local church. 

The problem is that we were flat broke. We’d been giving more than we could afford the year before, and at some point, we lost a grip on life. Before we found the Lord, we were drifting. As per Proverbs 29:18, “where there is no vision, the people perish”.

Not only did we have no vision, but we also weren’t meeting God’s instructions. After all, if you read the promises in the Bible carefully, you’ll see:

2 Chronicles 7:14 says, “If My people, who are called by My name, will humble themselves and pray and seek My face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land.”

This promises national healing and forgiveness, conditional on the people’s humility, prayer, seeking God, and repentance.

John 15:7 says, “If you remain in Me and My words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.”

Jesus promises answered prayer, contingent on the believer’s deep, abiding relationship with Him and His teachings.

Through my amazing mentors at Rhema South Coast, I learned that if you don’t feel that God is answering your prayers, you can do the following:

1. Identify what you’re asking for. Are you clear about what you want and how it will fit into your life? Will God still fit into your life? 
2. Find out if it’s God’s will for your life. Ask God to give you scriptural confirmation. 
3. Check your obedience. Are you meeting the conditions of your request? 
4. Wait. God’s timing is always perfect. 

And so, when our next payment came in, it wasn’t enough to cover the bills. But it hadn’t been for months, so nothing new. Without speaking to James, I went ahead and tithed 10% to the church anyway. 

After all, God’s word carries a guarantee, and I trust Him. Malachi 3:10 says, “Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, so that there may be food in My house, and test Me now in this,” says the LORD of hosts, “if I will not open for you the windows of heaven and pour out for you a blessing until it overflows.

Suddenly, we saw God’s provision everywhere. There were blessings upon blessings around every corner, and so many answered prayers. It’s like the Word says in Luke 6:38, “Give, and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over, shall men give into your bosom. For with the same measure that ye mete with it shall be measured to you again.”

Note, I never said money fell from the consistently clear skies. As Pastor Larry says, “Money is the lowest form of prosperity the Bible offers.”

Instead, God sent us work.

He brought comfort when we needed it.

He bought us time when we didn’t have enough.

He gave us the words we needed at the right time.

He rolled stones out of the way.

He parted waters.

He kept us healthy, or brought us healing when we were sick.

He renewed parts of our life that we thought were dead.

And He sent us material blessings. 

Fasting & Prayer

In January, we did a 21 day fast. Our first fast last year was very strict, and we aced it for over 40 days (40 days being the agreed-upon time). The January fast was much tougher, but we made it with a little bit of gas left in the tank. 

We completed Life Class at church, and we most recently completed Destiny Training 1 on our 7 months wedding anniversary, and a week before our 1 year of being committed to Him.

Writing a new Story

After 1 year of being born again and growing in our relationship with Jesus, we can testify to the magnificent power of our Mighty God at work in our lives, and the amazing love of Jesus, who left us the Holy Spirit to comfort and guide us. We can testify to the power of fasting and prayer and seeking a relationship with Him.

God never promised us a life in which we’re always happy with the events around us. But He promises that we’re loved. He promises His comfort, and several thousand other blessings, because He wants us to prosper. 

We look forward to where He might lead us in the next year as we continue to seek a closer walk with Him. 

Thank you for reading this. I want to encourage you, if you have not yet done so, to give your heart to Jesus, and turn your life around. Say this with me:

“Lord Jesus, I call upon Your name, acknowledging that I am a sinner in need of Your forgiveness, and I believe You died for my sins and rose again to give me new life. Come into my life and be my Lord and Savior.”

God bless you!